Counselling: - What You Need to Know
Counselling is not the only type of bereavement support available but is often the first that people think of. It doesn't suit everyone and there are many other ways that you can get the support that you need to help you cope with your grief. In fact, most people can be helped by other types of support, especially specialist services that relate to the circumstances of their bereavement and where they can meet with others who have been or are going through something similar. We recommend in the first place that you search through the comprehensive range of support on the bereavement services section of this website.
However, some people do need counselling, especially if they are ‘stuck’ in their grief or their grief is complex or the bereavement traumatic. If you feel you would benefit from counselling we provide here some information about what counselling is, what to expect and how to find a good counsellor that suits your needs. The information is helpfully provided by ACC (The Association of Christians in Counselling and Linked Professions) and applies to the profession as a whole.
What Is Counselling?
Counselling is a professional relationship providing a confidential space, in which you can talk through issues affecting your life with someone trained to help you.
Professional, qualified counsellors have skills to help people in many situations. Most counselling sessions are done through regular meetings over a period of time and counsellors will work with the issues that you bring and towards the goals that you have set.
Most qualified counsellors will know how to support bereavement but some may have additional skills in bereavement and other areas such as addiction, trauma or children and young people.
Although there are many types of counselling, all counsellors should offer;
a safe place to talk
empathetic listening
a supportive relationship
a process to reflect and consider your thoughts, feelings and behaviours.
When Is the Right Time to Get Bereavement Counselling?
Some professionals suggest that bereavement counselling is best left until six months or more after the bereavement. It is at this time that friends and families have often begun to get on with their own lives and may assume that the bereaved person is ready to do the same. It is also when unresolved issues are more likely to have become apparent following the informal support of other services and friends.
Is Having Counselling a Sign of Weakness or Failure?
Having counselling or any type of bereavement support is not a sign of weakness or failure. In fact, it takes courage to be open to yourself and others about what is going on in your life and to seek professional help. Asking for help or support is the right thing to do when you are bereaved as it is a way to help you along your bereavement journey and is a positive step towards grieving healthily.
How Do I Find a Counsellor I Can Trust?
Make sure the counsellor you choose is on a register of counsellors overseen by the government via the Professional Standards Authority (PSA). Anyone on the PSA register will be trained and committed to ethical practice.
You can find registered professional counsellor registers on the PSA website. Search for the type of counselling you are looking for or the region where you live here.
You can also access a counsellor through;
your GP
workplace or school
the Association of Christian Counsellors
the Bereavement Services section of this website to search for support local to you. Look for accredited counsellors - they will be trained to the standards of the profession and required to maintain a high standard of professionalism by continuing professional development as part of a requirement of their membership. Look for BACP or UKCP.
What to Expect From a Counsellor
Counsellors should provide you with a contract in your first session and clearly explain:
the services they offer and what they charge
their confidentiality policy and boundaries
the professional bodies that they are registered with and their ethical code (see above).
Information About ACC
The ACC is a registered charity which holds a Professional Standards Authority (PSA) register of counsellors who are:
professionally qualified
working within a code of ethics
Christians
ACC Counsellors work with people of all faiths and none. They do not impose their beliefs on anyone and value different faith perspectives.
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